If you find that when your son or daughter enters teenage years your relationship with them starts to change do not be concerned. This is a new phase of their life. As a child, they may have been willing to follow your ways, your standards and your beliefs.

However now they are entering a stage of life where they will decide on and define their own beliefs, standards and ways. Some of their decisions may conflict with your perspectives, but do not be concerned. If you trained them well as a child your influence in their lives will always be there to guide them.

With the help of some young friends, I have put together a series of tips designed to help you maintain a successful relationship with your teen during these restless years and on into their adulthood.

Teenage Years, Fun or Frenzy?

We started with looking at:

Eight things you can DO to help build and maintain the relationship between you as a parent and your teen.

One of these 8 tips was:
Do discuss issues with your teen. Now I am not talking about a heated discussion, but a good discussion over a cup of coffee or an ice cream. You may of course carefully point out the consequences of the issue in question, but the final decision will be theirs. Don’t ever try to control that.

What if they make the wrong decision? This is where unconditional love comes into the picture. You will always be there to support and love no matter what happens.

Now this does not mean you have to “bail them out”. No, let them pay the consequences (this is how they will learn), but always be there to support.

Dining together as a family was another tip that my friends thought to be important. The family dinner table can be a great place to share and strengthen family bonds.

You can find more about the first 4 tips (listed below), by clicking here.

• Do discuss.
• Do point out the consequences.
• Do allow choices.
• Do dine together as a family
  (Click on the link above or here to read more).

More about the second 4 tips (listed below) can be found here:

• Do trust them (this is very important)
• Do restrain (with wisdom)
• Do involve them in the family activities (they have not left home yet)
• Do continue to believe the best (this is also VERY important.
  Click on the link above or here to read more.)

Teenage Years – Parents Adventure or Nightmare?

This depends greatly on your relationship with your teenager.

Here is a list of things to avoid doing in order to maintain a successful relationship with your teen.

You can click on the links to read the complete post about the respective topic.

Don’t Argue

Don’t Threaten Your Teenager

Don’t Punish Us, My Teenage Friends Say

Don’t Smother Your Teenager

Don’t Antagonize Your Teenager
Here I take a look at three definitions of the word “antagonize, and apply them to your relationship with your teen.

Don’t Ignore Your Teenager
(This can be a major temptation when things get difficult.)

Don’t Give Up On Your Teenager

I trust these tips will help you with your relationship with your teen. I look forward to hearing about your experiences and recommendations that will help to build a successful relationship with our teenagers.

May All Your Relationships be Successful!

Today in a celebration of Father’s Day weekend, President Barack Obama called upon fathers to be teachers and mentors. This does not mean you have to be a perfect father he stated, just one who cares and tries.

Your children will probably rate you as their perfect father if you simply do these three things:

Be involved with your children as they grow up.
Don’t leave everything to your wife. There will be times when you may need to make some sacrifices in your own agenda, but these adjustments will pay off greatly for the rest of your lives.

There are many memories that you can create in your children that they will carry into adulthood. They will become better adults just because Mum AND Dad were both involved with:

• Their needs when they were sick.
• Their sports activities.
• Their homework.
• Their field trips.
• Their school progress.

It is WELL worth any sacrifice you may need to make to be an active part of your children’s agenda as they are growing up.

Be available to your children when they need you.
Develop an “open door” policy with your children. This means building a trust relationship with them that will let them know that the door of your home office, your study or your workshop is always open for them to come and chat with you whenever they need to.

Be willing to devote personal attention to your children.
One great way to create some extra special memories in your child’s life is to spend some individual time with them as often as you can. At least once a month would be great. This will give them something special to look forward to as well.

You could take them out for a treat which would give you an opportunity to give them your undivided attention for an hour or so. It would also give Mum some time to herself which I am sure she would appreciate also

President Obama commented today: Just because your own father wasn’t there for you, that’s not an excuse for you to be absent also. It’s all the more reason for you to be present.

You have an obligation to break the cycle and to learn from those mistakes, and to rise up where your own fathers fell short and to do better than they did with your own children, Obama said. That’s what I’ve tried to do in my life.

A true teacher and mentor leads by example.
It is all about spending time with your children, learning to communicate with them and above all having fun with them. I know in my own childhood one of the the memories that stands out the most are the family activities in the back yard. Every evening when the weather was favorable our parents would play badminton, french cricket or something similar with us. These fun times left a very positive mark on our lives as we grew up.

Vice President Joe Biden gave a short comment during the Obama Father’s Day presentation, exhorting Fathers to love unconditionally. The importance of total unconditional love cannot be emphasised enough.

Unconditional love means your children do not have to earn your love nor will they ever be in fear of losing your love if they “mess up”. They will always simply KNOW that you love them.

Fathers, I know you do love your children but let them know that this weekend. Yes this Father’s Day weekend is a celebration for you. You can make this time extra special by making the effort to reinforce your love for your children and so strengthen your family bonds.

Have you told your children you love them today?

May All Your Relationships be Successful!