If you find that when your son or daughter enters teenage years your relationship with them starts to change do not be concerned. This is a new phase of their life. As a child, they may have been willing to follow your ways, your standards and your beliefs.

However now they are entering a stage of life where they will decide on and define their own beliefs, standards and ways. Some of their decisions may conflict with your perspectives, but do not be concerned. If you trained them well as a child your influence in their lives will always be there to guide them.

With the help of some young friends, I have put together a series of tips designed to help you maintain a successful relationship with your teen during these restless years and on into their adulthood.

Teenage Years, Fun or Frenzy?

We started with looking at:

Eight things you can DO to help build and maintain the relationship between you as a parent and your teen.

One of these 8 tips was:
Do discuss issues with your teen. Now I am not talking about a heated discussion, but a good discussion over a cup of coffee or an ice cream. You may of course carefully point out the consequences of the issue in question, but the final decision will be theirs. Don’t ever try to control that.

What if they make the wrong decision? This is where unconditional love comes into the picture. You will always be there to support and love no matter what happens.

Now this does not mean you have to “bail them out”. No, let them pay the consequences (this is how they will learn), but always be there to support.

Dining together as a family was another tip that my friends thought to be important. The family dinner table can be a great place to share and strengthen family bonds.

You can find more about the first 4 tips (listed below), by clicking here.

• Do discuss.
• Do point out the consequences.
• Do allow choices.
• Do dine together as a family
  (Click on the link above or here to read more).

More about the second 4 tips (listed below) can be found here:

• Do trust them (this is very important)
• Do restrain (with wisdom)
• Do involve them in the family activities (they have not left home yet)
• Do continue to believe the best (this is also VERY important.
  Click on the link above or here to read more.)

Teenage Years – Parents Adventure or Nightmare?

This depends greatly on your relationship with your teenager.

Here is a list of things to avoid doing in order to maintain a successful relationship with your teen.

You can click on the links to read the complete post about the respective topic.

Don’t Argue

Don’t Threaten Your Teenager

Don’t Punish Us, My Teenage Friends Say

Don’t Smother Your Teenager

Don’t Antagonize Your Teenager
Here I take a look at three definitions of the word “antagonize, and apply them to your relationship with your teen.

Don’t Ignore Your Teenager
(This can be a major temptation when things get difficult.)

Don’t Give Up On Your Teenager

I trust these tips will help you with your relationship with your teen. I look forward to hearing about your experiences and recommendations that will help to build a successful relationship with our teenagers.

May All Your Relationships be Successful!

This is something that is so easy to forget especially in the home where more stressful and difficult circumstances are likely to show up on a daily basis. But getting frustrated and lashing out with negative words will only make any situation worse.

Speaking out of frustration can destroy.
One thing I hate to hear at the supermarket is a parent speaking harsh or belittling words to their child. It hurts to hear it. How much more must it hurt that child that is receiving the lashing! I am sure you have heard this too.

I know that grocery buying time can sometimes be difficult with young children, but getting frustrated with them and speaking harsh words will not solve anything. In fact, speaking disrespectful words will cause your children not to respect you and then when they become teens (and even long before), you may wonder what hit you!

A little encouragement can go a long way
I know it can be difficult to guide a child with his homework for example, especially when he/she may have learning challenges. But I also KNOW they can rise to any challenge when they are encouraged.

I saw a tremendous change in one young lad after spending time with him telling him he can and even making him repeat positive words about himself. In less than a week he was able to conquer a learning area that was thought impossible for him.

So, when a child has difficulty with something, especially a school subject, the first thing to do is to work with his/her mindset. You may even have to stop and work on your own mindset first.

Do YOU believe they are capable? You will have trouble encouraging them if you don’t!

Simple words of encouragement and affirmation can go a long way:

Please never do this!

Unfortunately this happens all too often. How many children are told they can never do something, or will never be good at a certain task? When they grow up, these negative words can be terrible obstacles as they try to reach their goals.

If you were told as a child that you could not do something, let me tell you now YES YOU CAN! You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to.

It is never too late to start speaking positive words to your children, to every member of your family, to your friends and to yourself. You CAN!

May All Your Relationships be Successful!

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