And Avoid the Frenzy and Nightmare

Techo-Teenagers by Leonard John Matthews on FlickrIf you find that when your son or daughter enters teenage years your relationship with them starts to change do not be concerned. This is a new phase of their life. As a child, they may have been willing to follow your ways, your standards and your beliefs.

However now they are entering a stage of life where they will decide on and define their own beliefs, standards and ways. Some of their decisions may conflict with your perspectives, but do not be concerned.

Two major keys to any successful relationship is love and communication. One expression of love is to show a genuine desire to communicate with the person.

When both love and communication are present in a relationship any problem can be worked out.

Teenager on the train by 1Nancy on FlickrWhen some parents face difficulties with their teenagers that seem impossible to solve, they tend to take the “easy way out” and simply ignore their teen. I am sure you have heard of the theory “if I ignore it, it will go away”. This is so often the human way of coping with many situations that are difficult to handle.

However, in actual fact ignoring a problem does not solve anything, but rather it allows time for any unresolved emotional reactions to go deeper and fester.

There will be added difficulties if communication difficulties existed with your teenager when he or she was a small child. But be encouraged, it is not impossible to restore your relationship with your teen to become a successful one. It will take some time, patience and a determination to win. But always expect the best, and you WILL win!

Group of TeenagersA few weeks ago I took some time to chat with some young friends about their perspective and experiences on the ideal relationship between teens and parents.

We came up with 8 things to do to enjoy a good relationship with your teenager, and 7 things not to do. You can find the 8 things to DO here and here.

Now let’s take a look at some of the things they were saying not to do.

We took a look at 4 things you can do that will empower you to win your teenagers and influence them in the previous post. The teenage years can be fun, or they can be a time of frenzy. It really depends how you approach them. It will certainly be time of many changes. The way you relate to your son or daughter who is now becoming an adult will change.

Here are four tips that will help you avoid the frenzy and enjoy the fun.

Teens with Mother1. Do trust your young adults.
I had to laugh at the comment I received on this one. “Do trust your teenager, but don’t forget he/she is still just 16 years old”.

Although it came across as a little funny, this comment carries excellent wisdom. In other words do not let them have the upper hand.