Successful Relationships

The other day I was working through a book about accelerated learning and came to an interesting statistic. Jack Canfield (famous for his co-authoring of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series) organized a survey where the words spoken daily by school aged children were noted.

The mindset of children today.
A team of surveyors followed 100 children for a complete day making a note of the number of negative and positive statements that each child spoke during that day.

The results were staggering:

Written by a guest writer, Barbara Desmarais
Over the years I’ve coached many parents both privately and in groups. I’ve come across so many who are in regular conflict with their partner. They frequently argue about how to discipline the children or are carrying around resentments and hurts towards each other.

Parents Set The Tone of the Household.
Just like a leader in an organization the parents set the tone of the household. Even if they aren’t openly arguing if they’re at odds with each other, the tension between them is felt by everyone.

If they are openly arguing and doing it in a hostile way, the kids are affected. They’re affected in a way that impacts who they are.

The spoken word is very powerful. Proverbs 18:21 tells us: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” (English Standard Version). Wow! So with words you can bring life or kill.

This is something that is so easy to forget especially in the home where more stressful and difficult circumstances are likely to show up on a daily basis. But getting frustrated and lashing out with negative words will only make any situation worse.

Speaking out of frustration can destroy.
One thing I hate to hear at the supermarket is a parent speaking harsh or belittling words to their child. It hurts to hear it. How much more must it hurt that child that is receiving the lashing! I am sure you have heard this too.

Do you think it is possible in this day of extreme rebellion, lack of respect, and self-centered “ideals” to still enjoy a loving yet respectful relationship with your children?

Well that does greatly depend on you as a parent. No, I am not talking about being a perfect parent, none of us have quite reached that characteristic yet. And neither are there perfect children (except yours of course

We do live in a difficult age for children growing up and their parents trying to guide them. But there are certainly some things parents can do to help point children in the right direction and give them an opportunity to win this race called life.