Successful Relationships

Most children today are paid allowances and that in itself may not be bad, but let’s stop and think for a moment.

What exactly are we teaching them about money by simply paying them an allowance?

You are bringing up a child who will be a future husband or wife, a missionary or a volunteer worker in a foreign land, a states person. They could be someone of great influence, even a president.

A future entrepreneur?
This young man or women may one day own their own business, or they may simply end up work for someone else or in Corporate America dedicating their lives to building a giant for someone else.

A friend who recently celebrated his 16th wedding anniversary gave me big keys to a successful marriage. These three keys have allowed GD and his wife to enjoy all of these years of a great marriage. I shared one of these keys in the previous post, and now let’s take a look at the other two keys. To a great measure these two keys are unseparable.

Key No 1 – Faithfulness.

Key No 2 – Communication.
I am sure you were expecting to see this word pop up sooner or later Let’s explore this a little.

What exactly is communication? I have noticed that some people have the concept that communication is a one way street. They speak and you listen. Or worse still,

Some people say that successful marriages are made in heaven.

But this is not so.

The real secret is that successful marriages are blessed in heaven and made on earth.

The day you stand before the alter to join together as husband and wife, your marriage is blessed in heaven.

Then comes the work on earth!

These are marriages where each partner CHOOSES to make their partnership work and they BOTH work at it. They also both CHOOSE to be happy. This will create a strong, successful and happy marriage.

Strong marriages make strong communities!

And how to avoid falling into them.

Walter Winchell
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

Anonymous
To have a good friend is one of the highest delights in life; to be a good friend is one of the noblest and most difficult undertakings.

How true is this!
A good friend is one of best treasures in life, yet at the same time to be a good friend is not always that easy.

We have already looked at some of the attributes of character that will contribute towards creating and maintaining a solid friendship.

Remember, we mentioned

Trust – respect – value – forgiveness and love.

There are also some things you need to avoid doing if you want your friendship to remain strong and solid.

If you live on this planet you know very well that human beings tend to have their ups and downs. Some more than others.

It can be very difficult trying to relate to some folk at times.

However a well founded relationship will always ride the storms, especially when these 5 attributes are in the hearts of the folk involved.

Trust.
This can be a big “issue” for many people. Perhaps you have difficulty trusting because of past betrayals or failures. Trusting again may be a risk, but let’s face it all of life involves risk. If you don’t take any risks, you will not achieve anything.

John Kennedy is quote as saying: “Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.”

It is always good to meet new friends. It is especially nice to meet others with whom you share some of the same interests.

Then now and again we meet someone we immediately “click with”. There is a special bond that seems to instantly unite you.

After conversing with this new stranger for just 15-20 minutes, there is that strange feeling that you have known them for a life time.

“Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends.” ~ Mary Catherwood

I recently made a trip back to New Zealand to visit my sister, and reconnect to extended family members. My mother came from a family of 6 living brothers and sisters (2 others had died as children). We grew up living in a town near to two of these families.

One family lived in Oamaru and the other in Dunedin and we lived not too far from either of these families. This meant that vacation times were spent visiting one or the other. Consequently, in a sense my sister and I grew up with our cousins from both of these families.

Once we grew up, we all scattered across the world.
Then we all grew up and started to scatter across the world. One cousin married a sea captain. Her brothers followed her husband’s example which resulted in them being scattered across the world. Others went over to Australia as many kiwi youngsters do, looking for greater opportunities.

And Avoid the Frenzy and Nightmare

If you find that when your son or daughter enters teenage years your relationship with them starts to change do not be concerned. This is a new phase of their life. As a child, they may have been willing to follow your ways, your standards and your beliefs.

However now they are entering a stage of life where they will decide on and define their own beliefs, standards and ways. Some of their decisions may conflict with your perspectives, but do not be concerned.

Today in a celebration of Father’s Day weekend, President Barack Obama called upon fathers to be teachers and mentors. This does not mean you have to be a perfect father he stated, just one who cares and tries.

Your children will probably rate you as their perfect father if you simply do these three things:

Be involved with your children as they grow up.
Don’t leave everything to your wife. There will be times when you may need to make some sacrifices in your own agenda, but these adjustments will pay off greatly for the rest of your lives.

There are many memories that you can create in your children that they will carry into adulthood. They will become better adults just because Mum AND Dad were both involved with:

This is the seventh article of the series Teenage Years – Parents Adventure or Nightmare How you can embrace the adventure and stay away from the nightmare.

These tips were either suggested or approved by my teenage friends, and the seventh tip that was named is:

Don’t Give Up!
I recently asked some young friends what a successful relationship between teens and parents looks like from their perspective. We came up with a list of 8 tips for parents to do (see this list here), and then went on to think about things not to do. As we were going over a list of “donts” with a grin they added “And don’t give up on us”.